I Want To Trust You. Can I Trust You? What’s more important than having trust in the person you leave your newborn baby with? All parents want to feel that the person they have hired to care for their children can be trusted. Trusted to use good judgment. Trusted to be oh-so careful. Trusted to be reliable. Trusted to be focused. Trusted to be honest. Trusted to put the welfare of the child above everything else.
How do you get to that point? It’s a process to be sure. Are gut instincts enough when hiring? No, they are not. They are, however, enough to disqualify a candidate – just not to hire one. If you think you can be productive at work second guessing the person you left your infant with, think again. Parents need to do their due diligence. This may include engaging a reputable agency to help them in this task. But if parents go it alone, there are minefields to be sure. It is critical for parents to talk to references. Preferably multiple ones. Be aware that old references often have ongoing relationships with their former employees. They may weigh in with their old nanny to say whether they think YOU will be a good employer! Make sure to have more than one meeting before offering the job.
If a nanny has a long history of childcare and great references, those nannies assume that the prospective employer, should trust them. Trust ME, here’s where the disconnect begins. The issue is that the prospective employer doesn’t know this person or their references, so they are forced to take what seems like a huge leap of faith. Many times nannies are completely offended by new parents’ lack of trust. Why doesn’t she trust me? I’ve been doing this job for 20 years? Why not? Here’s what I have had to explain to our offended nannies: This new mom has no personal history with you. She doesn’t know all those children you’ve help raise. She needs to have her experiences with you first hand. She needs to see you calm her screaming baby. She needs to see her baby’s face light up every morning when you walk in the room. In the beginning, there is none of this context or resulting comfort. Parents can hope by doing their due diligence and making a great choice that a new relationship will be forged and that all important trust will evolve. It does take time.